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Thu, 11 Aug 2011:

Monday, August 11th 2003.

I will remember.

I can still feel it in my gut. The pointless despair, the rising anger, panic and the frustration of being at the recieving end of someone else's ego trip. Knowing that I was forever changed from that moment forth.

It was a valuable lesson - something I don't plan on forgetting.

--
Experience is the most brutal of all teachers.
     -- C.S Lewis

posted at: 08:30 | path: /me | permalink | Tags: ,

Wed, 11 Aug 2010:

In Memoriam - Monday, August 11th 2003.

And I mourn for a loss I cannot explain.

--
I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you.
        -- Nietzsche

posted at: 17:30 | path: /me | permalink | Tags: , ,

Tue, 11 Aug 2009:

In memoriam - Monday, August 11th 2003.

They said that time heals all wounds - they didn't know me at all.

--
Blessed are the forgetful; for they get the better even of their blunders.
        -- Nietzsche

posted at: 17:30 | path: /me | permalink | Tags: ,

Mon, 11 Aug 2008:

In memoriam - Monday, August 11th 2003.

Half a decade later, I still remember like it was yesterday.

--
It will be a memorable time -- no matter how hard you try to forget it.

posted at: 12:30 | path: /me | permalink | Tags: ,

Sat, 11 Aug 2007:

In memoriam - Monday, August 11th 2003.

That makes it four years now, but I remember like it was yesterday.

--
If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we would all be millionaires.
                -- Abigail Van Buren

posted at: 08:30 | path: /me | permalink | Tags: ,

Sat, 18 Nov 2006:

There are no innocents in this war. To not have an opinion is treachery to a greater cause - for it needs nothing more for evil to thrive than good men to stay out of the battle. But when the battlelines are a line in sand, unclear & transient, only a vocal minority survives a twinge dissent in a dystopia which rewards disloyalty with a jingling bag.

The squeaking wheel always gets the grease, but does a wheel squeak for all others bereft of lubricant ? But there are wheels within wheels, connected cogs running this juggernaut that fulfils our needs, wishes and aspirations. This isn't a zero sum game, where everyone else has to lose.

But silence is golden. In fact, it will be bought with gold, spices and precious stones. The turncoats reap the profits of their new found discretion and the immorally inept, failing to curb their conscience, experience a re-run of Mr Carrot meets Mr Stick.

Like in the game in its simplest form, the winners always defect.

--
It occurred to me that my speech or my silence, indeed any action of mine, would be a mere futility.
                -- Joseph Conrad, "Heart of Darkness"

posted at: 02:17 | path: /rants | permalink | Tags: , ,

Sun, 13 Aug 2006:

On this August 11th, I completed the third year I've been working in the software industry. My first day shall forever be burned in my memory, for that was day my ideals died. If I seem too cynical, too pessimistic about the software industry, it all started from day one. For that was one day that caused all five of us to leave eventually and destroyed any vestiges of loyalty we might have had. I don't regret having gone through all that, because I learned a few valuable lessons, just a few hours into the job.

So, all of us were picked up from campus on the very first day of campus interviews. We were all satisified and never attended any of the off-campus interviews that our friends who had got into Infy and CTS were going to. I even lost interest in my GRE score and that pacakge from Georgia Tech is still lying on my shelf unopened. So all idealistic and eager, we arrived in their Electronic City office, around 8:15 AM on that fine monday morning.

We were part of a batch of 68, who were all joining on the same date. There were students from all over - Pune, Coimbatore, Allahabad, Mangalore and Bangalore. So our exams ended by late June and the lab results for us weren't tabulated till date. Of the group, all eight of us and three others from Pune didn't have our final year marklists. After the employee IDs for four of us were generated, some guy realized this fact and literally threw us out of the hall.

"You didn't inform us that your marklists weren't out. We will call you back when you have a degree" - those were his exact words. We were told to go home and that we would be called back along with the October batch of new joinees. We were more scared than pissed off. Fresh out of college and with no job, we were pond scum in the job market mill pond.

First thing we did was call up our parents. We even called up our principal and placement officer. The latter earned our eternal scorn by washing his hands of the affair. And to compound the issue, there was an ongoing student protest in the university college.

In the midst of the rioting students, policemen with tear gas, my father and Joe's father managed to find that our marklists were ready to be tabulated. They managed to find the clerk in charge of this, drive him to the uni, get it tabulated, got him to take it to the VC's house and get it signed & stamped. And all this, they did before 2 PM.

After making 800 rs/- worth of phone calls and such heroics from our parent's, the marklists were faxed to the HR by 3 PM. We were very reluctantly admitted and our employee IDs generated. We had gotten in and we assumed that it would be a smooth ride from then on.

So the training began. Most of us spent the days on the back-row playing virtual pool, copter and other flash games. And it really pissed off our trainers when me and Sreekrishna walked out of the half-hour C++ exam about two minutes after it began, with near perfect scores. Hardly did I know that we would pay dearly for those stunts.

We were informed about a week into september that we were going to be posted in Hyderabad for a Telecom & Internet reqs. And I mean, just the three back-bench wise-asses. And when I asked about openings in their embedded wing, I was told that "In bangalore, there are only testing openings" (for freshers).

Off to Hyderabad, I went. Only to discover that after all this drama, I had been posted to a testing job. My job involved filling in an excel sheet with PASS/FAIL depending on whether my button mashing on the mobile phone caused it to dump core. And all three of us started working on our resumes rather than our day jobs. And then came the rejections. Sometimes outright rejections when I was passed over for people from known colleges - IITs, RECs, BITS and elsewhere. Talent just didn't seem to matter and mine was very hard to measure in an interview (I am useless on paper).

After six interviews and no job, especially that Unix & C rejection, I was disillusioned about a career in software. I decided that day and then that if I manage to escape, I'll never again work in a services firm as a cheap brain for clients somewhere.

But ...

--
Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss put in an honest day's work.

posted at: 21:19 | path: /me | permalink | Tags: ,